mylife

i m back into where i belong

Todae i went to City harvest Church..at first i din want to go..cuz i was too lazy to wake up but then sth told me that i might get sth out of today.this is like the first time i attended CHC..it was at expo..delirious came..
the starting of the worship,i was still sian sian one...but then half way thru, i had a picture presented in my mind..
i had a picture of a little girl running to her father and she was crying as she ran to Him.The father face was full of gentleness and love.i had this feeling that the girl was stubborn and naughter and decided to venture out on her own and in the end got hurt instead..and the father was smiling as her father watches her make her mistakes and falls down....and i could feel strongly that the father was glad that she finally decided to come back,torn and tattered..the father consoled her and hugged her...i felt that the little girl was me and the father was God..cuz i could hear a voice in my head that say gently,"Come to me and i will heal you" and a verse came into my mind.."Whoever hopes in Him will renew their strength..."

and i started crying and crying..God after all hasnt forgotten abt me..then i duno wad happen sudden darkness overwhelms me as i had a mixed and uneasy feeling in my heart..i sudd felt insecure..i was pretty scared,cuz i m in the hse of God.In Him,there is no darkness..i ask God,"where are you?!where are you?!Plz dun leave me!" and i heard Him said,"My child,I am ALWAYS right beside you"
then i saw this hole covered with a lid but then somehow it was open and i travelled out into His glory and light...i guess God was trying to tell me to trust Him even when i m in darkness even when i dun feel Him..this has been like the first time since duno when i really toke to God wholeheartedly..

and oh Delirious introduced a few new songs.One of them was "Take off my shoes" which simply hit me..

I'll take off my shoes
I'm coming in
Untie this rope,
I'm staying with Him,
Love of my life,
Just for the moments
For my king and I

Why did You call,
Why did You wait,
For someone so guilty,
someone so fake,
There are no words
For my beautiful song,
Now i'm in the arms
of my beautiful One

Hold me, blow all the pride
From my bones,with Your fire.
Hold me,breathe on this heart
Made of stone,keep it pure
Hold me,Saviour of heaven and
Earth,King forever.
Hold me,Love of my life lead me on
Through the fire,lead me on

this song hit me the most cuz as was i said in my previous entry,i long to be in His embrace.the part of"Hold me and breathe on this heart made of stone,keep it pure" has always been wad i want..

God is really an AWESOME God! even though i m not fully recovered but i can say i m no longer in darkness and i have decided to fight against the devil and not let him take me!!!!

posted by HIS child @ 1:50 AM