Wednesday, May 31, 2006

CF camp!

hah.juz sorta came back from CF camp..CF camp was great lar! haha.learnt quite a few things from the seniors..and also bonded a few of us closer together..haha..and i learnt quite a few things..had fun with the teasing them.haha! here are some pictures..

my team!

me and janene

haha.thinking abt..hmm

honestly..when i came to CF heart was burden with the thots of thinking of wad position will i get..and i prayed abt in pray that i will stop thinking abt it.and i did God's grace.haha.
and also i wanna thank God that even throughout the camp i slept very little..but i had a good rest as in i wake up everyday feeling refreshed! cuz u n0e wad..i was resting in the presence of God..and everytime before i go to sleep..God will put a song in my mind for me to hum in my i kinda listen to my own singing in my mind and fell asleep..
hmm...then all along before coming to the camp,i was thinking that i surely will get into fellowship one..but heart is not really wanting to be in fellowship lar.even though if i get it.i dun mind lar.
so ok..the last day of camp..the seniors gave us some time to pray abt it.and i was praying to God.and He kinda filled in all the positions in the comm in my mind lar..i mean somehow i juz knew whu is gg to get wad..and He even gave me a passage to give to janene.haha.before that i was telling her that she is gg to get vice pres..and i told florence that she is gg into fellowship.haha.and i knew i m gg into i was kinda prepared when they told me i m in worship lar.even though i din really really get wad i wanted which is vice pres..but i m really very happy to be in worship too..and it's God's plan i will say "let You will be done,not mine!"..haha..and oh worship i still have alot to learn! and during that time of prayer..God kinda told me that our focus this year will be on evangelism lar..and He gave me a picture of a tree..which later come in is juz so awesome lar!!!i love my Big Daddy!
haha.and oh..i really m touched by the seniors washing our feet..i m really really super touched..the humility they ve shown..and i m even more touched when andre had to wash my feet.after all beside he is older than me..he is a guy!and is juz so super super humble of him to wash a girl's feet..i mean the rest is like girl and girl and boy and boy..ahha.thanks Andre.i have alot to learn from u. =) you can be my big bro! haha..dun bully me
and then after that..we went to holland V to eat..dessert!whee..haha..along the way crap alot..haha.and then after a while..i was kinda tired..and became quiet lar..yar..sorry guys if i look grumpy.haha.i m juz tired.haha.

finally.comm 06!let us embrace wadeva challenges that is coming our way together yar! united we stand! i seriously can foresee a lot of challenges and difficulties lar..sigh..but neverthe long as we are united..the devil cant do anything against us.amen?

Friday, May 26, 2006

the HEART of worship

oh well...last week has been a pretty much busy week for me..pratically becuz ive got drama everyday!
and yesterday thank God it ended earlier...
i went for CF..had some meeting..
then had to rush off to Bethel AOG for Satuarate Worship conference.
firstly..i got lost!!i stopped at kallang mrt instead of aljunied! and then i walk and walk until i see the road sign: "Lorong Geylang"..i m shldnt be in this kinda of place..and there were like men smoking..i got real scared..and then i called ps andrew and realise it was aljunied..haha..and then i got lost at aljunied..i walk around for duno how long..and in the end i found my way there..thank God..
actually this kind of reminded me that in my life when in times..i got lost..and starts to stray away..God is always a good sheperd whu pulls me back on the right kinda tells me this walk is not easy..i had a real difficult time to get to where i want..which is bethel..somewhat rep "home" and like where i in with all the God my journey to heaven..but u noe wad..God is always there to guide me to the correct path..
anywae learnt alot of things during that short night service..God reminded me that why in the first place He called was becuz of my heart..not bcuz of abilities..i m guilty to say that ever since He called me to be a worship leader in the future, during synergiz 05..i have been focusing on my abilities and the quality of music instead of the integrity of worship..i m guilty that many a times..i am afraid of what others will tink abt my worship and i forgot that a role of a worship leader is to facilitate not manupilate(duno how to spell) the congregation..and sometimes i duno if i m edifying myself or God..the focus is juz not right..yest..i made my heart right with God..i told every bit of these guilt and sins.and He took them all away..and gently as a loving and kind Father..He said..juz rmb i chose you bcuz of your HEART not your exterior qualities..
i m so totally refreshed! Praise God man!
yay! i love my BIG Daddy!

Friday, May 19, 2006


PASSION AC is over...though it is marks the beginning of what is going to come..there is more to that the harvest is plentiful..we,as servants of God have to start working now..we can no longer lay back in our comfort zone..we have to step out is the time for us to stand for wad we believe in!
yesterday was an amzing night..those whu din went missed out man..aniwae before passion Ac..a few of us had spiritual attacks..i had a few..i almost was too sick to go for it..and then even before passion ac..i had some issues that keep bothering my heart..and i was super lost..cuz everyone is so busy and fast paced..that some even lose their was rather chaotic lar..haha..
but after fervent praying and praying..i felt better..
and i m so touched and happy by the number of people whu went up for altar call..i mean..God really is awesome lar..haha..
then we keep encoring..haha..alot of us din want to go home..haha.then i believe Shaddrach also got hyper at the end of the was simply juz great..yupyup

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

daily devotion

Then the Spirit of the Lord came upon Jephthah. - Judges 11:29a
We've all heard stories of individuals who have overcome extreme hardship during their childhood years. Children of alcoholics, orphans who never have parents, loss of parents to a fatal crash, childhood disease - these are all difficult circumstances to overcome.

Jephthah was a man who overcame his obstacles and refused to allow his circumstances to prevent him from becoming great in God's sight. He was born to Gilead, a result of his father's adulterous encounter with a prostitute. Gilead's wife, who had bore more sons, decided to reject Jephthah, and drove him away from their home saying, "You are not going to get any inheritance in our family because you are the son of another woman." Imagine the rejection this young man felt as he was cast away from his own family.

This experience taught Jephthah to become a hardened warrior. Today he probably would have been part of a street gang. As he got older, his reputation as a warrior became known to those in his country, so much so that when the Ammonites made war on Israel, the elders of Gilead went to Jephthah and asked him to be their commander. Jephthah had to fight off those feelings of rejection from previous years.

"Didn't you hate me and drive me from my father's house?" he responded. He overcame his hurt and pain, and responded to the call God had on his life.

It is said that if we were to help the butterfly remove itself from the cocoon, the butterfly would not be strong enough to survive. It is the struggle that prepares the butterfly to become strong enough to fly. Without the struggle in the cocoon, it could not survive as a butterfly.

The Lord prepares each of us in similar ways. Some of our childhoods seem to have been harsh and born from a seemingly unloving God. However, the Lord knows our struggle and will make our life an instrument in His hand if we will follow Him with an upright heart. He does make all things beautiful in His time if we are willing to be patient.

oh well..i shld stop thinking abt the past..shld let it all go into God's hand..

Monday, May 15, 2006

mon blues?

todae morn came to sch in a rather cheerpy mood..while everyone was so tired and moody..oh well..mon..wad do u expect..aniwae..Sonia,i ll pray for you! juz rmb..NO MATTER WAD HAPPENS,JUZ HOLD ONTO HIM!! DUN EVER LET GO!!YUPP..

aniwae..todae worship din go well lar..kinda first time leading in CF..though it it informal..but still...kinda disappointed and all..and after that my mood seriously juz went all the way down man..pearl's words keep repeating in my mind...i was telling her this morn..that i signed up for worship comm..then she told me that i dun even really noe how to play the guitar..i dun even noe alot of to be the worship is true not saying that she discourage me or wadeva..i m juz glad she told me the truth..i have the passion and heart but seriously dun have the abilities..sigh.. the end of the day i was really tired man..those kind that if u say sth that may hurts me alittle..i will start tearing liow..oh not usually like that..but wun i m tired..i can really tears alot..todae i was reminded back of the past..he reminded me when i was in sec 2...i still rmb that some of my frends whom i trusted sudd juz turn their backs against me..then on blog they start saying how irritating i probbing into their conversation..and trying to get into the conversation when they juz want it to themselves..those days were horrible..they din even tell me what was wrong with me..and they juz started to..nvm...its all in the past..

coming back to todae..oh well..firstly i m curious becuz i care..if i dun even bother..i wun even want to know anything..or wadeva it is going on..i m so afraid that they might find me irritating again..cuz they are the frends that hold dear to me..bcuz of my past..i have become so sensitive..i cant help it..cuz i m sorry im sorry that i keep time..i wun ask anymore..i m juz hurt that whats there that u all cant tell part of u all after all..nvm..i shall juz remain ignorant..after all ignorant is a bliss..
why does it hurt so much?why..oh well..maybe becuz im tired...maybe bcuz i felt that u all juz dun trust me..

you all are one bunch of people that i love very very much..but developing close and strong relationship needs time..and im not sure if i have is time to choose which grp of frends to focus my time on..cuz i cant possibly spilt myself up..can i?

i duno..super tired now..cant think clearly..dun even noe what im typing..haha..

Sunday, May 14, 2006


todae is sunday again!haha..juz now had lesson with Siow hwee on the whole book of Acts..cuz this year my cell organising church camp mah..yupp..quite understandable lar..the book..haha..
then we chose our chairman! -------------------------------------> Xiao Mei!
haha..i can say she got leadership qualities..and the vice chair------------------------> Josiah!
haha.kinda glad that i m not in any of these positions..cuz being a chairman or vice chairman= alot of commitment
even though juz now we were saying chairman nth much to do..but in my heart..act i noe..there is alot to do..haha..i think it is God's plan lar..that i dun take up any leadership position..cuz i rejected being a treasurer cum secretary too..haha..actually honestly..there was a tiny weeny inch in my heart that i feel like being the chairman of this year camp..this is because i somehow felt that if i become the chairman..spending time with my cell members will become my priority lar..and also this yr's theme God's commission and the holy spirit..i m more familiar with lar..esp the holy spirit(my close frends shld know what i mean) and it is my stronger understanding out of the whole bible..cuz it covers only the new testament...but i say..wadeva is in His hands.and i will trust Him..
oh..and when i say this camp is not my priority doesnt mean i wun spend time and effort doing is juz that it is not my priority lar= not 100% commitment..cuz i cant possibly spilt myself up into different places lar..i will juz die..haha..but still..i will try to do my best..cuz they are all God's work..haha..but sigh..somehow i feel that i m not as close to them as before..i miss last year where we were more united and in a sense "innocent"..
they are one bunch of frends i hold dear to lar..but somehow..things juz start changing..oh well..changes are inevitable..
i intend to focus more on CF! may it be whether i m in the comm or not(but pls pray that wadeva the outcome is,i will accept it and trust that it is in His plans =) )and also my worship life...i realise i have alot and alot and alot to learn abt becoming an extravangant worship leader..i mean i din juz realise it..but i realise that i have to do sth abt it this year lar..haha..
moreover,i still got my tons of hw..and tests..and relationships that i need to keep up with..all these is enough to keep me busy man.haha...

anywae no matter wad happen, i m going to say "Let You will be done,not mine"

Friday, May 12, 2006

photos express a thousand joy

Thursday, May 11, 2006


haha..ok..todae was a rather eventful day..haha
firstly i had two test..and i think i m going to fail my math test..hah...lolx.aniwae was rather stress in the morn lar..then i was really excited about the CF outing we are going to have..cuz i m in the planning com..whee!!haha..aniwae i was juz totally excited and lots of energy..but i guess all the energy drained after a while..haha..
aniwae we had some problems..then i was kinda stress and becomes high D..i was running abt trying to set things right..then David was like is juz an informal outing..i m kinda fustrated lar..but after ahile..i kinda relax and juz let God do all the work lar..i mean it is an informal yar..juz have fun..and i sure did have fun..haha..then Faith Medothist Church really has a nice rooftop..i was walking outside alone..while the rest were inside singing lar..i juz felt i need some quietness and thus walked out..haha..and then God kinda told me sth lar..i felt sth lar..i felt wad i m expecting wun come out lar..yupp..then i talked to my Daddy for awhile..and then abt the question Andre asked me earlier..when can i lead morn first i told him i cant..not so soon..but God kinda told me that if it is not now then when..i need to start off somewhere.. i keep using the excuse of having not enough courage to lead worship among strangers..but then if i dun start off somewhere..i will nv have the courage..and how can i get into worship comm if i dun have the courage..oh well..i had a good talk with Him..haha..=)

Monday, May 08, 2006

CF interview..

well..nth special happen todae except CF interview!haha..oh din go as well as i thot it shld go..haha..i think i was kinda nervous or tired..cuz towards the end of day,i was having a headache and feeling some questions they ask i juz answered.but not the normal way i will ans it wasnt intimidating lar...maybe becuz i know the ppl there..haha..but then i was surprise that the interview was so short..towards the end of the interview i wanted to say "huh?so short?" but decided not..haha..and one q stunned me lar..joel ask"wad is ur stand of BGR?"..i m like huh?no link leh..haha..and they ask like wad happen if someone tells u that he likes u..i mean how wld i one ask me that..and i nv had a bf before..aniwae..i juz answered maybe not cuz i wanna focus on study and my chritsian life..but then act..if i were to like this guy and this guy were to like me..and of course this guy is very strong in his faith and loves God more than me..i ll prob accept lar..i mean.perhaps he can help me grow in my christian walk?haha..but i was too tired to say that..haha..lolx..

sigh..i m gg to fall sick..there is so much work to do! pls pray for me..i m feeling so tired!

Friday, May 05, 2006

cam obsessing..haha

my balloon,kathy n melodie!

thinking of handsome guys??haha.lolx!

Monday, May 01, 2006


rather long time nv write liow..ok..maybe not..but i use to blog everday but not now..haha.
saturady went for synergy at nyjc..xiao bai n kailing say that the acjc jacket make me look like fisherman!wad the..aha..but quite funny though..haha..then they ask me wad CF stands for..i tell them it stands for cool fishermen..haha..but in the end told them it stands for Christian Fellowship!!!haha..synergy was ok lar..not bad..the dance was abit disappointing cuz firstly i dun really understand..secondly,they not very sychronise in their movements..
ohhh..then after that went chomp chomp to eat!i din even noe there ios such place until kailing told me.then xiao bai say i not singaporean nv heard before that place..chomp comp is really that famous meh..ahaha..nvm..had a great time eating there..ahha..ate satays,chee kui,carrot cake and my dessert..haah..lolx.but still kinda disappointed there dun have roti prata..i kinda miss roti prata..haha..

todae decided to stay at home to do my hw.. so sian..sigh..doing my stupid PI..
nvm..aniwae happen to come across these two picures..haha..rather funny..
i make them jokes of the day!